So we've reached the end of Pride Month. The companies with rainbow logos will switch back tomorrow (unless they were thanking the NHS this whole time and didn't even notice Pride Month without the sponsored parades). We've talked a lot on this blog this month, about everything from queer history to media to educational resources. But what we haven't done, at least explicitly, is talk about what Pride actually means to us and how we experience it. Here's what each member of the current committee had to say.
Tristan, President
The first place I was ever openly trans offline was a queer youth group run by Yorkshire Mesmac, led by the first openly queer adult I ever met. His name was Ben and he was an artist in his sixties. He made pottery and risqué jokes, had attended the first ever Pride in London, had a fiancé and some fantastic stories, and never wanted thanks for the support he provided. He exists in a type of compassionate and unapologetically queer masculinity that I can’t quite put words to but which I aspire towards.
The first time I ever went to Pride in 2016 also happened to be Ben’s wedding day. He showed up part-way through the day with his new husband, dressed up in a suit in the middle of York Racecourse. He was, unsurprisingly, the first person I ever knew to get married to someone of the same gender. The two memories are intertwined for me and I think that has shaped my perception and appreciation of Pride.
When I think about Pride and about the pride I have in my own queerness, I think about having a real-life queer role model for the first time. I think about seeing a potential future that wasn’t just abstract, it was real. I think about how grateful I am to Ben and how that gratitude translates into a desire to be visible to others. There is no obligation for visible queerness and plenty of people aren’t interested in it, but I think even those people benefit from seeing a wider spectrum of potentials, of real and concrete examples of queer lives and queer futures that many of us don’t encounter in our youths.
To me, Pride is possibility.
Jake, Male Welfare
To me, Pride is about finding a group of people who you can be yourself round, as you may have been closeted at home at one point, or you may still be. It’s about accepting who you are and being proud of what you stand for. Being able to know that nobody should be able to make you feel ashamed of who you are, and saying to the world that you are who you are and that you are proud of it. It’s about finding your family and being unapologetically yourself.
Amelya, Women's Welfare
While we all love Pride, parades and parties, its important to remember that pride isn’t just a celebration. Its a protest. Our brothers and sisters fought, died, and are still fighting and dying today, to ensure we can all have our piss-up in the park.
Next year when you attend Pride, take a moment to remember and pay respects to the amazing men, women and non binary individuals that paid for our rights in the UK and across the world, sometimes paying the ultimate price.
We’re Here, We’re Queer, We Won’t Fucking Disappear.
Taylor, Trans and Non-Binary Welfare
What does pride mean to me? Well I’ve never been to an actual pride event so I can’t comment on that. Every pride since I realised I was bi in 2015 and then enby in 2016 has been around family, who I am not yet out to.
BUT, that summer in 2015, I went away with scouting on the World Scout Jamboree, and when you’re over 6,000 miles from home and are meeting people from all over the world, suddenly your bubble gets that little bit bigger. And when you can’t even say you’re bisexual out loud but manage to tell someone and they instantly come out as pan, you suddenly feel that little bit less alone. On that trip I also told one of my best friends in scouting who had previously come out to me as bi, I then got one of the best hugs I’ve had.
When I then went to the World Scout Jamboree in 2019 as an adult, I worked in the Rainbow Café. It’s an organisation within Scouting that I think can best be described as pride in a tent. (It’s a big tent dw) I told my whole family it was just a café with a cool name and I mostly served coffee, when in reality I worked with adults from across the globe in celebrating who they are regardless of laws. As the Jamboree that year was held in America, we had to fight for every bit of pride they gave us. At one point several countries including the UK technically weren’t attending as the US was considering going back on their abolition of rules surrounding gay leaders. Until a month before the opening ceremony they wouldn’t let us have anything, we got the adult area but it wasn’t until 24hrs before the opening ceremony, once the young people were on site, that they let us create a young people educational space called The Rainbow. That tent may have been far too hot but working there on some of my days was an experience I will never forget. When the signs (produced at a very high price for a fast turnaround) specify that all photos must only contain the faces of people who feel safe being in them, and a 14 year old girl breaks down on you cause this is the first positive representation she’s seen in her life, suddenly pride becomes a whole lot more meaningful. At the same time that tent rocked. We had an inflatable unicorn that our guest speakers sat on and we emptied all the local stores of ribbon for making friendship bracelets.
I would also like to say that that not only did countries threaten to not go in response to the homophobia, they also showed pride once they arrived under threat that this might be it for this jamboree. The UK culture tent had the staff working there in rainbow vests that were ‘tube stop colours’ (we all knew the truth). Canada had a pride flag up on their food tent. At an official meeting the countries were told to tone it down a bit. (They did not) Also my tent with 1 enby, 1 trans guy and one bisexual woman (plus the poor cishet who shared a tent with us) had a tent COVERED in flags. At the adult rainbow café I worked with the biggest ally you will ever meet, this cishet 6ft something bloke did not care if his excessive use of posters in the next door actual café drove away bigots, he wanted to put the pride signs there and got upset when he could not.
And then I cam to uni. Most of you reading this probably met me before I wrote this so idk if you’ve seen me change (‘Look how big/proud you’ve gotten’) but I have. First time I met anyone from this society was the first time I introduced myself as Taylor and I neatly had a happy breakdown over it. I was referred to by they/them pronouns by default, in February I went to a book signing, got my first item signed under Taylor and met a middle aged human with an enby badge on their incredibly punked up denim jacket.
My point is the world is bigger than your current situation. Be it crappy family, crappy colleagues or crappy course mates. Support is out there if you go looking, pride is bigger than just your hometown and there is a whole international campsites worth of people who have your back and more. The LGBTQ+ community create the best support networks, and to me, Pride is about finding those people and that support, be it for a protest, a friendship or both.
Kezia, Equalities and Accessibility
I'm thankful that I'm privileged enough to be fully out of the closet, wear my binder, and kiss my partner in public without fear, but I know not everyone has this luxury. Everyone deserves to be themselves without feeling under threat or "different" and pride is so important in this. I hope one day I can write stories or make music that can help other queer people feel as confident in their identity as I do, let questioning people be more aware of the identities out there, give us the representation we're so lacking, and encourage non-queer folk to be more accepting. We all deserve to feel proud of who we are.
What does Pride mean to you? We'd love for you to let us know!
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